I was wrong

It’s that time of the year again. A time when customary offerings are entangled in this merry ambiance. When consumerism betwixt the embodiment of love and reciprocation. As I assumed every year would be the same again, that tidal relationships do not extend beyond places I could never reach. I was wrong…

I thought a platonic connection would far endure the ravages of time. I thought that you will be there perpetually, and that all those conjectures and mindless thoughts are just a cat and mouse games for others in our sphere of influence. I was wrong again…

You are just like them… And I hate it. I hate why in this myriad cliques of strangers, you are not different. I hate how you extend deep into me, only to let it all go… That your conviction with this bond we share has faltered

I hate and miss you altogether at the same time…

This Line Between Us

Imagine relationships as threads and strings, it runs down your bed, through your door, to your car, to the city and through all the people that encapsulate your daily habitual customaries. It brings you to places, to memories, to feelings you thought you’ve never felt before.

These strings weave and wove, forging relationships and anything along these heartstrings… With each thread pulled, our heart spins like a spool, twining out trust and a piece of ourselves with each circumvolution. The more we spun, the more we reveal our inner self, till we are able to find someone who could see the whites of our spools, someone who will eventually venture into our inner recesses. Even though we know at some point these strings will snap, we kept weaving. Searching of that someone whom we can face with no reserves. Someone whom we will truly open up to… And in between we colour the lives of others and ours as we became the seamstress of our own destiny.

And when the time comes, we either find that person or lose them altogether… Though the threads of fate have severed, but what ever has been woven in my heart remains. As we tied the knots to the end of our relationship, I know it will never be the same again.

Cause and Effect

As lightning tears across the casted skies, the heavens cried… Mourning my loss and filling this void in between… As this ache in my heart swells with each torrential pour I found myself driving in circles. Like a boat with no sail and rudder, I lost all sense of direction.

Somehow I just can’t accept the fact that she’s gone from my life. Just a few days ago, we were still the best of friends, and days after it all crumbled down like a house of cards. Maybe it’s fated, maybe it’s providence, maybe it’s just never meant to be…

In her vivacious discourse, lies anger and resentment… There is no redemption, no excuse, no forgiveness… All that’s left is just acceptance…

Cause and effect… That’s how the world works… If only I could have more control over the cause…