Tuesday, February 5, 2008

The End of Nothing...

Today we drew a clear line between the lovers we once were and acquaintance we eventually are - A final full stop to the end of this love hate relation.

She wants the return of her physical belongings; I want nothing more than a faint physical memory. She wants to clear all her debts to me; I want nothing more than the monetary emotions I once purchased to be. I guess it doesn’t matter anymore, for she has already taken everything from me.

Alone at her doorstep, I could hear her from behind. Behind that wooden divider that seperates us from vision, that block that stopped me from feeling what I should and would feel, that barrier that forestalled my tears… She’s so close yet so far, so near yet she can’t hear… In this deafening silence, echos of her voice rings through my head. Flash backs, reminiscence, recollections of past happiness all rushed back to me… But I did not make a sound, in this lull of stillness, I’m just telling her “I love you” in silent consonance. She can’t hear it… But it’s there…

I’m shipwrecked, drowning in this sea of emptiness… Marooned on this loveless ship that she has rabidly escaped… Now she’s just tying up all the loose ends, so that she could start anew with this new vessel she now anchored her heart upon. And I am left to survive on my own…

We are strangers but not that alien enough, we are friends, but not so close again. In this cleft between the mixed connections we now shared, perhaps we are just familiar strangers… Strangers that will probably never meet again…

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